Where to start this month? It is all moving so fast, becoming a blur at times as your growth accelerates and changes and expands.
We are literally bursting out of the house, out of the play room, and running out of time and ideas as to where to put you, what to do.
The month started with a 700 mile trip (one way) to see your Aunts. I was a bit apprehensive but knew we had to do this in order to really see what our limits were, what we could try with you. I regret doing it without your Daddy as it really seemed to affect you during our absence.
I think because he is so very involved in every aspect of your parenting, both of your acutely felt his loss. Maybe if there were only one of you I could have fulfilled the roles you needed. Sufficed to say, the trip was worth it, to see my girls, visit in their lives for a bit and then to know how absolutely wonderful your Daddy is and bask in his love and support once we got home.
Your Daddy was busy while we were gone finishing up your room, working in his shop to hone and polish beautiful wood details.
It felt good to complete this part of your room, when I was pregnant and on bedrest for those three months, all the details of your place in our home took backseat. We just could not get it to the point we wanted before you came. Then those first few months were about survival and getting through the challenges and we could have cared less what state your room was in, as long as you were asleep in it.
But now as things change and you spend more time in there, playing and exploring, well, I want you to grow up knowing what your Daddy’s hands can do and what they do for you.
We are finding more and more about your style of learning and exploration. We joke about making you, Owen, a shirt that reads “I go to the Source,” and this is an understatement….you need to know why and how a thing works, you need to use it properly, and you need to do it on your own.
No help for you, oh no, I can see it already, you taking things apart with whatever tool we let into your vicinity. It is both awesome and a bit daunting as you are still so small, so young, and you do not really understand the consequences of finding the source, you just know you want it.
Mason, you continue with you bimanual exploration and fascination. Always with two things, always careful to make sure they match in some way. At bathtime you grab your veggie people who sport cute faces, each different but similar in their size. You look back and forth curiously, speaking to them, “Bob?’ to the left hand, “A-Bob?” to the right, as if you are aware of these subtle differences and need to give them different monikers.
Very interested in anything Owen does too, you must follow, pursue him actually, and you do like to toy snatch. And tackle, wow, can you tackle. I have to break it up at times now, good to start the practice now, eh? I see no end in sight on this development.
And one funny thing about you, O, this was the month of the broom. You fell in love with the world of brooms but it was quite dangerous as you swung the long handles around so Daddy modified a broom at the shop and presented you with it upon coming home from work on day.
The look in your eyes was precious, I know you understood it was for you, your very own. Until Mason tried to steal it, that is. You love that broom and we are proud to see you practice sweeping as it means I have future home cleaners in the make….doesn;t it?
As for Mama, lately it has been a where am I?
Back to the old questions of what am I other than Mama right now? And do I have time to do anything else? And what am I going to do with you as your walking and running skills develop? Nothing seems as safe as it once was, and though I love the way you move around so well, you are not quite there yet. At times this month your heads were just bruised and banged and so sad to look at. It seems like you are learning about the whole spatial awareness thing, but when you are both tired it is a crazy time of falls and trips and crying.
I know it will get easier and you will get better and then we can have fun in less controlled environments, but that seems a long way off at times.
Hard to believe this marks the end of your 11th month.
It means we are just a bit away from one. Hard to think or even write that. I know we as parents wonder where the time goes. Do you? I doubt you concern yourself with things like that. Concern yourself only with this, my boys, this one very important fact. That your Mama loves you, loves you so very much. Stay safe, my little ones, we will watch out for you as best as we can. Love, Mama.